Idea for a poeme!

BXB&B! Ich haue devised an excellente planne for a worke of grete literarye merit, and of much sentence and solaas. And school-childer alle across thys grete erth shal reden of thes tales and thanke me for the delite they haue, much more delite than the distiches of catoun shal euere brynge, or even the grapes of wrathe.

Ich shal make a collecioun of tales with a central frame narratif, much lyk the Tenne Dayes of Giovan Boccacce, the whiche ich loue so much that myn copye of yt ys fallynge into fragmentz. But thes tales shalle be tolde nat only by aristocratik sots but by men and womyn of alle estaats (more jokes that waye! whatte ys funnyer than an argument bitwene a sumonour and a friar?).

Honestli, yt ys in sum parte sloth that thus driveth me, for ich haue manye litel wrytynges heere and ther, svch as the tale of the tow yonge knightes and perle harboure, and the vita of Seynte Cecile, that wolde nat selle as independente volumes. But package them wyth severale tales of aventure and slapsticke? Bad-a-bynge, bad-a-boume! A devyce of marketynge moore cunnynge than a foxe that has jvst been made doctour of cunnyng at the universitee of Paris! A devyce of marketynge so clever that yt maketh Bill 3ates look lyk Jessica Simpsoun! Ich am sorrye to be so prideful yn myn herte, but ich am really psychede.

Thogh ich am a man of litel lernynge and thogh ich bere a humble pen that kan nat be compared to the noble style of Cithero or Alanus of Lille or grete Dant who did trauel from helle vp to paradise, nevirtheless ich do beleve myn litel tales shal be a mater of sum discussion and intereste for men and women who shal come aftir me in states vnborne and accentes yet unkennede. And keepyng this in myn consideracioun, ich do thus presente here to yow, gentil rederes, the notes concernynge thes tales that ich made yestermorn at the custoume hous. Myn clerkli mayster in freshman comp did alwey telle me that a wrytyng planne ys always a goode idea, and ich tende to beleve hym since he ys now Archbishop of Canterburie so he must have doon somethynge ryght. So heere is myn wrytng planne. May it plese yow to pardon me the seuerale unrelated nootes ich haue made oute of ire or confusione, or concernynge litel dittees and balades the whiche ich do penne almost constantli. I include al of the mattir, both kernele and chaffe, heere for the sake of Ladye Clio the warde of historyes and bookes, and hopefulli to answere future scholarlyle questiones abovte the ordere and nature of myn tales:


BSL! As yf strucke by lightynge – finalli a waye to get ouer myn writeres blok...

Heere bigenneth the booke of the tales of Canterburie:

Howe coole doth that sounde? Organise ynto fragmentz, for ich trowe that a worke in ‘fragmentz’ shall appeale to Vmberto Eco.


-Intro/setup of frame: Something about Aprille – meetynge with the pilgrimes – pilgrimes in hir order and degre – the hostes proposal

-The Knightes Tale: Rafe and Dannie are tow freendes who fighten in the same war at Perle Harbour, but both falle in loue with the same ladye, Evelyne (Kate Beckinsale)

-The Milleres prolog and Tale: whatte Adam Pinkhurste did vnto me bifor I fired hys ass– chaunge names and occupaciouns – absolvtely fabliaux

-The Reves prologue and Tale: not svre yet – but definitlie haue an ironike aubade and vse the word “fnorten”, for “fnortynge” ys aboute the funnyeste worde of which y kan thynken)

-The Cookes prologe and Tale: heroik prentys named Perkyn Revelour survyveth al thinges that wolde kepe a playere doun, meeteth Gros-Blanche, an famovs rapper, and hymself getteth ovte of the workshop and the street to becum a starre, all thurgh his hustle & flowe - inclvde myn newe ballade 'tis difficult out heere to been a prentys'?

XXX lastes of lether at iii pennyes subdsidie a laste is whatte? Goddes nvts, wher ys myn abacus? Yf Nichol Brembre hath taken yt ayein ich am goynge to screame.


-The Manne of Lawes Tale: knighte of king arthurz court goeth on queste to discouere what women want. Possibli Mel Gibson?

Vivekes boones! Ich kan nat wayt to get home and playe oblivion on lowyses xbox. Myn ork barbaryan ys nerely at IXth leuel

-The dog-maysteres Tale: the dog-mayster (talle, curtel of greene), his dogge, and his companiounes do fynde an olde wool-quaye that semeth to be havnted by a foule spectre – one of them has those fancie new eye-lenses, the which she doth frequentli misplace – eventuallie they fynde that yt is John Gowere who maketh the appearaunce and similitude of a hauntynge in ordre to kepe the quaye closid, for he disliketh the noyse of woole shipmentes when he writeth hys lame poemes. They do counfounde hys plannes and he sayth “Cest conseil avreit eu success, si non pur l’interference de voz jeuenez meddleurs!”


-The Shipmannes Tale: Jak Sparrowe helpeth a yonge smithe to wynne his noble ladye, and the yonge smithe helpeth Jak Sparrowe to scapen from ghost pyrates. Howe avvesome ys that? Ghostes + Pyrates!

-The Prioresses Tale: fynde sum edifynge storie of frendship and cooperacioun bitwene Jewes and Christian folk? Make svre that Gower doth nat maken goode on hys threte to slippe yn thurgh forgerie hys owen tale of Hugh of Lyncoln, whiche ys aboute as tolerante and charmynge as a badger on methamphetamynes.

-Sir Thopas: worke ovte contracte with Thopas to tellen the story of his lyf

-Tale of Melibee: make vseful political allegorye wyth basic message: YE WHO RULE NACIONS, CALME THE HELLE DOUNE! try nat to be excessifly borynge

ther sholde be a daunce callede 'the bradshawe shifte'

-The Monkes Tale: telle a series of amusynge anecdotes, all ynvolvyng cheese?)

-The Nonnes Prestes Tale of the Cok and Hen, Chauntecleer and Pertelote: a tale collecioun wythoute a beaste-fable ys lyk a fayre ladye withoute a goode foreheade

More disputez concernyng herringe at grete yarmouthe? Ich do beleve god created grete yarmouth specificallye to bore parliamente to dethe


-Sum wordes of the hoost to the companye: The hoost proclaimeth that tellynge two storyes ther and two storyes back ys right stupid and ympossible – everyone shal stikke to oon tale.

-The Phisiciens Tale: heere inclvde the storie of Appius and Virginia that Gower did stele from me to putte yn his stupide Confessio. Possibli adde an extraneous bitte about educatynge yonge ladyes at the bigynnyng? Now ther is oon thyng Gower knowth nat of: yonge ladyes!


-The wordes of the hooste to the Pardoner, and the Pardoneres Tale:expose the hypocrisie of the institutionale chvrch! oones ich do that, certes the dominacioun of simple folk by the greedie and violent thurgh the strangelholde of religious ideologie shal cease outrighte and the worlde moue ynto a more enlightenede age wher civic virtue and the lore of knowledge regn, and no monyes go to religious swindleres. Or peraventure it shal be otherwise...


-The Prologe of the Wyves Tale of Bath: aske for a copye of thys from the Wyf whan she ys finished weavynge the t-shirtes for my blogge.

-The Wyves Tale of Bath: stele sumthynge litel from Boccaccio? None of the chambre knightz and merchauntz do reden of italien ficcion, so ich am soooo yn the clere

ther mvste be some maner of departure from thys place / sayde the makere of jestes to the laroun / ther beth muchel confusioun heere, and ich am troublede by barouns...

-The Freres Prologue and Tale: recycle sermon exemplum heere?

-The Sumonours Prologe and Tale: throwe yn euerythynge I kan thynke uppe about fartynge, asses, asses and fartynge, the ass of satanas, et cetera

...God wille thes merchauntz euere calm downe abovte their nut-swyvyng woole? Ther ys a place in helle for misers, and ich hope ich shal be appoynted ther to prikke ther feete with my quill pen...bakke to my notes...


-The Clerkes Prologe and Tale of Oxenford: thatte awfulle litel crypto-fasciste fable from Petrak, but make it a commentarye on how Phillipa doth abvsen me.

-The Marchantes Tale: invente and popularise the terme ‘May-Januarie Marriage’

blogge t-shirtes sellynge welle! peraventure ich shal buye litel lowys my soone that turntable setup he wolde fayne possess


madam, ye been of al beaute shryne / as far as cercled is the mapamounde, / for as the cristal glorious ye preene ete a beene acte obsceene planne a sceene are peachye-keene shyne – nowe whatte doth ryme with mappamounde? O, thattes yt...

-The Squieres Tale jvst go bukke wyld wyth legendes and flynyge horses and svche – they wil haue to invente speciale effectes ere they kan make a movie of this oon! – bifor wrytyng, possiblie get a hold of that straunge and addlynge wede that Tommy Vsk doth smoke?

o seynt hyppolytuses turdes! simon burleye juste totalli caughte me checkynge myn frendster accounte

-The Frankeleyns Tale: vse advyce column for inspiracioun?

-The Haberdassheres Tale: heroik Haberdasshere saues the globe of the erthe from a comete by making an protectif hatte for the worlde

-The Carpenteres Tale: heroik Carpentere saues the globe of the erthe from comete by making an protectif cupboard for the worlde

-The Webbes Tale: heroik Webbe saues the globe of the erthe from a comete by making an protectif mitten for the worlde

-The Dyeres Tale: heroik Dyere saues the globe of the erthe from a comete by making an protectif dye of indigo for the worlde

-The Tapyceres Tale: heroik Tapycer saues the globe of the erthe from a comete by – BSL! in what maner shal a makere of rugges and tapestries saue the worlde from a fierye comet?


-The Seconde Nonnes Tale: slyp in myn litel lyf of Saynte Cecile heere

o sweete euer-virgin mothir marye, kan ich juste make yt thurgh oon mornynge without dippyng my quill in myn ale-cuppe insted of myn inkepotte?

-The Chanouns Yemannes Tale (finallye an enemye everyone kan realli hate: alchemists!)


-The Maunciples Tale of the Crowe: wille peple beleve that Crowes were oones whit as snowe? peraventure nat, but yt shal be a storie of good relevaunce to moderne eventes

-The Knightes Yemanes Tale of the Englysshe Blancmange: thre freendes wishe to performe the acte of Venus, the whiche ys stille mysterye to them, bifor they leave the householde of their mayster – to fulfill thys counsel, they do seeke advyce yn unusual places yn a series of misadventures. Oon of them doth fynde a straunge but appealynge yonge mayde who doth preface alle hir tales wyth ‘this oon tyme, at the convent wher ich was raysed...’. Evventuallie, they realise that the acte of Venus ys but oon of loues servyses. Also putte yn sum amusynge sequence with a blancmange that is swyved.

CLV + CCIX + XLVI = ??????


-The Persouns Tale: vernacular pentientiale manuales sounde a lot more appealynge when they are ycleped “tales”

-The Ploughmannes Tale: vernacular manuales on agriculture sounde a lot more appealynge when they are ycleped “tales”

-The Hoostes Tale of the manere of makynge freendes and influencyng peple: vernacular self-helpe manuales sounde a lot more appealynge when they are ycleped “tales”

-The Ende: the Millere doth winne the prise of a supper at hir aller coste.
Peraventure include sum bit aboute how the redere ys the reale wynnere of the contest?
No, that wolde be cheesiere than Gloucestershire.

Fynde a publisshere? I sholde telle Adam Lynkferste to starte buyinge the parchemin nowe

69 comment "Idea for a poeme!"

  1. Good maistre Chaucer, I must be faine to explaine unto thee thatte alle werkes, prosaique and poetique, wroten bi mes servauntes duringe thir servis belongen to myn person.

    Therefore, I say unto thee go thou and indite these werkes bering foremoste in thyn minde that as a servent royale thou art the agent of myn aucthoritee and thus all werkes that thou inditest are myn. Thou shald riceve ane kinde acknowledgmente in myne prologue. Assuredly, thou bearest in minde that the accomodaciouns in myne tour of London be nat so faire as in thine owne hous, and thatte I am a moste generous and kindly kynge.

    Gowere hath most fervently promised mee that ich will be ynamed authore in the nexte editio of the confessio amantis. Methinks he did swete moste profusely whanne I bespoke him regarding maistre Ketch the hangman and the unpropitiousness of meting him. Twere a shame iffe the betyr poete didde nat acknoweledge his dutie to his soveraine lorde.

    Bysides, good maistre Chaucer, I wolde bidde thee to indyte a tale of which I have bespoken thee betimes, that of the Lorde of the Ringes and the Riterne of the Kynge, the whiche wolde moste assuredly ben a hitte.

  2. Ma cher Geoffroi,
    What, BSL, is BXB&B? Woe unto hym that doth against good Kynge Richarde speke, but if yt is the hartes and yndes of the school-childer you seke then scribe ye well the tales of the apprentice potter Harolde! They are totalie downe with that!

  3. My deere Pacanukeha (the whiche name ys quite niftie),

    BXB&B doth signifie "by Christes boones and bloode!"

    Le Vostre Servaunt


  4. Hastow nat been writtynge thatte for, lyk, X yeres ynow? I remembre whan thou camest ybak from Italye, thou wert alle braggyng that thou wouldst write a boke in swych a manere, but I think that thou then grew ddistracted by writynge for my John that faire Boke of the Duchesse, which he can nat rede because hit maketh hym to cryen so, and I have to hiden hit from his sighte.

    Stille, gode for thee, that thou dost returen to thy commytments elde! Would that I might to as wel. Got to runne -- my brether is doing something weird and I must see that he does nat kille his selfe.

  5. Master Chaucer,

    Yower plan for the Tales of Cauwnterbry maakest meny things clear now.

    As a humble inflicter of your genius upon the youth of this age, might I beg your permissioun to copy and present this outline to my students, that they might actually understand why, BSL, they arte reading this work?

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  7. Mistresse Katheryne,

    Peraventure thou mistakst this newe planne for myn olde poemes of the parliament of the briddes and the house of fame, the book of the leoun and the historie of the double wo of Troilus? Thogh, trewely, as I saye, ich am recyclynge sum olde materiale in thes newe tales of canterburye.

    Also, Mayster Adam hath chaunged the lynke on myn rotulus bloggorum so that yt now sheweth thyn newe blogge. The whiche I do looke vpon wyth muche pleasure.

    Le Vostre Frere


  8. whatte Adam Pinkhurste did vnto me bifor I fired hys ass– chaunge names and occupaciouns – absolvtely fabliaux

    I grone. Loudeliche. And crye "Harrow" as I were wood.

    That were cruelle, Geoffrey.

  9. Deere tutor,

    Sure, thou mayst copyen myn litel poste of myn planne. Ich am humblede and flattrede that thou woldst thynke to do swich a thyng.


  10. The Frankeleyns Tale: vse advyce column for inspiracioun?

    Actually, you might want to check out some of those Breton lais; a few of them are quite profound. I'm just saying.

  11. Oh this giues me grete solaas. I do thenke that is the beste idee yow have hadde yet. Iwis, yow knowe, do yow not, that all the buzze in the manuscripte trade thise dayes ys aboute the 'miscellany,' speciallie amonge the marchants who have too muchel golde to knowen what that they shulde done with yt. (Yow shuld perhapes to cheken oute the manuscripte yclepen Auchinleck.) But noon maker of poetrie has yet thoht, as fer as I knowe, to writen oon all be hymself. It ys a brilliante planne. It wol sellen like hotte cakes.

  12. knighte of king arthurz court goeth on queste to discouere what women want. Possibli Mel Gibson?

    In gode sooth, thys womman wolde nat wante Mel Gybson yf he were ye laste manne on erthe. Perchaunce yf I were more into kynkynesse I wolde thynke differentlie...

  13. A faire and goodly plan! Ich awaite with breath bated amain for the tale that doth concern the blancmange swyved.

    A C thankes as well for the blogge t-shert. At the greate gatheringe of the learned doctores of letters (the wych wee have each monthe in its cours wether wee lyke it or no)ich made quite a ster with the sherte wyhch proclamed the lucratif aspect of the letters of le moyen age.

    The moste of laughter did come out of the mouthes of the doctores of American letters, who have no such sherte, BSL.

  14. Good maistre Chaucer, ich wonder if thou and thine web-maistre, the good Adam Lynkferst, wolde make for us, thy loyale fan-gyrls, a Tshirte wyth the wordes "Gladie wol ich lerne, and gladlie teche, but ich shal not gladlie wryten a longe and borynge thynge", whiche ys both wyti and truthful, and whiche yn myn owne humbl opinivn, bilonges not yn the descripcion but on a Tshirte ytself.

  15. Mine god maistre Chaucer,

    I fynde thine werke which thow hast arrayen and glosen digne, leeful and eek worthy, but sanz a plat conclusioun, as me thynketh it acordaunt to resoun. I mot nedes given thee a bet on.

    How seemeth this:

    Al the pilgrimes maken an end at Canterburye, and, rage with a quyke tyme of god disport and pleye. Maybe aftir, they heere anothir tale. I knowe somdeel a greet on about a sely burl highte Beryn. I kan dighten and enditen it for thee, yif thou wole. What saist thou?

    Maistre Anon.

  16. Mayster Geofrey,

    Youre Pardoneres Tale tells what treuthe is -- no tresor is bettre.
    Ich bet it beat Boccaccio’s “Buccolicum Berlusconi”, for prize of Bookere.

    Thou saide:
    “eftsoones ich and thee shal drynken togedir in chepe ... ich shal fotten the bille!”
    I wol not stand for Stella or Kronenberg 1334 ne none oother continental lagers, BSL! Kan thee a taverne with Sky Sportes? -- In the cryccit the Antipodes are in all sortes of bother agaynst Bangladeshe, ich rekene the followe-on could be on the cardes, ful pleses me.

  17. Master Chaucere:

    Perdaventure yow colde usen yowre tale of "Arcite and Anelda" for yowre Knightes tale.

    But if thu moste writen a tale of Amazonis, hwi do hi nat fyghten?!? Alle thatte hi do ys to sitten ond wepen. Bot hi been Amazonis! BSL! hwatte self-respectinge Amazona wolde sitten and wepen whanne thatte ther ys parfitlie gode fyghting to be doon?

    Yowre seruant,
    Katerine Clare

  18. I think that thou shouldst leave the Prioresses' Tale as Master Gower intends, then wilt thou be assured the screen rights shalt be bought by Mel Gibson, with grayte distrubution amongst the Infedyl, paricularly of Palestine, verily including the Hamas and the Hizbollah.

  19. CLV + CCIX + XLVI = ??????
    CDX, thou grete sillye ponce

  20. I thank the wel and Adam eke for chaungynge the link to myn owen blog.

    Hit be of greete lyklihode that I confuseth the sondry matirs of thy poemes, for thou knowest that my brain be litel and womanly, so I doe oft forgetten and confusen thinges. Thy brain is, howevere, really really bigge, and so thou knowest of a grete manye deelen, and I doe often sayen to Philippe that she hath wedded wele, and only Johne ower, forsooth, Kinge Richard himselve might be a bettre matche for any dame.


  21. Maistre Gefroi,

    I have lerned a new waye to make oathes withouten blaspheming, and so ich seye to yow &%*@)%(^$#)%&*$%^^! Ywis this semes betere and more refined than youre abreviationes, as do meny thinges thatte I scribe seme betere than whatte yow write.

    Wille the gratuitouse afrayes on mine name never ende? Do yow nat knowe of mine preparation of a conter-apele? Thys alle be griste for the mill.


  22. For the introduction, why not take the bit from your post of April first?

  23. Nonne habes occupationem vel negotium? Puto purmultas horas vacare tibi. Nihilominus, placet legere iste nuge tuarum.

  24. Nonne habes occupationem vel negotium?

    Etiam Inter labores multos in casa custumarum, multum tempus remanet pro compositione nugarum, Magister Scoccane. Mei supervisores non habent conquestum de mea efficientia.

    Le Vostre treshumble Servaunt,


  25. My deare Geffrey,

    Thre wordes:

    Allegorie, allegorie, allegorie!

    Rememberen: alle that writen is, to oure doctrine it is ywrite, ywis!

    (And, thou mayst quoten me on thatte!)

  26. Vraiment yt bihoueaz yow to get an eygent and optione yt to Stephan Speilbergge. Yf nat elles yt will end upp as a pleye of Meister Pasolin featuryng Robin Askwithe, or some other travysty.

  27. Ich haue a litel wrytynge heere,
    Inspired by a night of FoureX Beere,
    May it plese yow to pardon me
    But hath it merit? Do yow see?

    Whan that Octobre with his shoores soote
    The drought of Septembre hath perced to the roote
    And bathed every vein in swich liquor
    Of which vertu engendred is the flour
    When Zephyrus eek with his sweete breeth
    Inspired hath in every holt and heeth
    The tendre croppes and the yonge sun
    Hath in the Scales his halve cours yronne
    And bushe fowles maken melodye
    That slepen all the night with open eye
    So priketh hem nature in hir courages
    Thanne longen folke to goon on pilgrimages
    And DINKes for to seeken stronge straundes
    To ferne chambres, couth in sondry londes
    And specially from every Territorie's ende
    Of Australie off to Bondi Beache they wende
    The blissful Sonne and Surfe for to seeke
    That hem hath longen for whan they were sike.

  28. Anonye Mouse of Astrolabes--

    Whatte follie!
    Plagirisme est alle the raj...
    Witte yow thatte boke of the milione litel pieces? An aulde storye.

    Mon cher Chaucere,

    For accommodacions on pilgrimages, ich lik the B. X. Bedde & Brec-Fastte atte Canterburye, a faire hous wythe goode hearthes and sans louses and eeke grosse harrye rattes. Thatte wolde be nastye!

    Goode and clenely, 'streuthe, and ich recceve a kicce-bacce for eche wonne of pilgrimmes thatte ich dragge inne the inne.

    Trewely, yow moght do worsse...


  30. or grete Dizzle who did trauel fizzle helle vp ta paradizzles

    Herestow that sounde? Yt ys Dante, spinnynge in his graue. And Godde is angrie as wel.


  31. Mon cher Meistre Chaucere,

    Hwi nat endite a lyf of Seinte Katerine in-sted of a lyf of Seinte Cecelie? Seinte Katerine hath moche more sentence ond solas. Ond yow miht been bettre serued to plese His Grace the Kynge of Espanie ond Duke of Launcestre by enditing oght to honour hys paramour, in-sted of tryinge to quieten thatte lytel whynnere Cecelie Chaumpagne.

  32. Michael O. - WabasscumApril 13, 2006 at 8:54 AM

    In me straunge lond, Polande, Ic ne knewe Chaucer nogt aboute.
    Thanne Ic comme to Wabbash Colage and Ic lerrnde Chauceres longage.
    Sere, of this websyttes, Dyde professoure Kynnane bie your Chauceres sherte?
    Ic admiere your interesse in Chaucer, bot hou yow finde teymes for that ?

  33. God maistre Chaucer,

    Ich do think yowre tale doth runne over long. Ich wolde cut a few tales.

  34. Good Maistre Chaucer, I llich aoure trauai. I ham dilitable yow have mynde upon onond reparaylynge of Mene Engel. I bi-luken llich yow Up-set of yow idea for a poeme. Wat obout wryt a poeme obout the graunt plite of Newe gerse, cweman? Yow eten graunt cointise in the langage, yow a lare-fadir? God lure!


  35. Icham, hou do yow speke, a noob, whan a-bouten Mene Eglisch. Yet I mot reken on the taske of wryten in the leden of Chaucer for me lare-fadir. The graunt prolouge of Chaucer be a bicche. oure website be verray tretis. Chaucer had noot a "Wuschliste". Me attle Chaucer nolde lyke "Straight Outta Compton".

    I hope yow haue a gode lyf,


  36. Ich do think yowre tale doth runne over long. Ich wolde cut a few tales

    Ma cher enthousiaste d'histoyre,

    That beth whatte Tommy Vsk doth telle me. Frette nat, for ich do sore doubte that y schall bringe alle of the tales to complecioun.

    Le Vostre


  37. Ma/mon cher/e Blanc/he,

    Chaucer had noot a "Wuschliste". Me attle Chaucer nolde lyke "Straight Outta Compton".

    Ywis, I dide, by goddes boones. Thou kanst fynde it yn pages DXXIII-XXXV of the 'chaucer lyf recordes' by Crowe and Olson. Ich haue recentli updated yt, thogh.

    Le Vostre


  38. Good Maistre Chaucer, I llich aoure trauai.

    Grant merci, Monsieur Tedde. But ich wole knowen: thou writst "cweman," "lare-fadir" -- redestow the psalter on the tongue of the angles, or peraventure the sermones of aelfric?

    Le Vostre


  39. Samuel BrainsampleApril 13, 2006 at 8:10 PM

    Myght Ich humbli suyest a Tale of the Hibernian att Wymbledoun? Yt ought ben gud fower a laugh.

    Swyving blancmanges? The mine wyf ood et thatt up, strewth.

  40. Geoffrey Chaucer,
    Ich love thee plane for a collecioun of tales from men and womyn of alle estaats. Honetli, Ich deme thee ben an excellent man of literarye merit. Forthy Ich wilnen to yeven thee alle my conseil.

  41. Yow nyce prisunes of Englisch. This blog is not for yow. Envined it is bayn.

  42. Envined it is bayn.

    By Seynt Jerome, ich noot of what thou spekst.

    In confusione

    Le Vostre


  43. þu hast oon blogge fyn, goode manne and poet. Yt hath alle from feoh to éar! Verrili, lynked þu art!

  44. Cher Geoffrey,

    Rather than addle thine brayne with wede and lose thine yifte of poesie, thou oughte to seken oute some of those Showcase Presents Superman collectiones which have some of the weyrdeste shitte Ich have ever sene in alle myne dayes. In particular, thou oghte to have a robot that is trayned to smasheth cameras somewhere in thyne worke. The tale of Melibee in particular would benefit from the inclusioun of swich matere.

    Also, hastou a livejournal fede?

  45. Mon cher Meistre Chaucer:

    Ich wol adden mi steuen to Aelf, aboute the kyrtle, bot me seemeth thatte the kyrtle oght to sayen:

    "Gladli wol ich lernen, ond gladli techen, bot ich wol nat enditen noon dissertacioun!"

    Yowre seruant,
    Katerine Clare
    (Been ther, doon thatte, maden oth nat to doon so ayein neuer, bot nat gotten the soueneir kyrtle.)

  46. Cher Geffrei,

    Ych moste proteste qwyte thy handlyng of one Cecilie. Darest thou gyve her oure address in Cornehull? Fie upon thee!

    She hast ycum oft be the cote where Kytt & Ich, bothe at mete-tymes and whilst Ich am a-slumbre, raysyng all manere great clamoure and stynke whilst Ich am in composicioune upon myne visiones. Shalt I nevere reaches a Dee? Shalt Ich pourtaye yow moste infellycitousely yclad as a frere?

    In closinge Ich make reqwest humble that ye give Mme Chaumpagne thy trew noumbre and gyve her faire answere. Goddote, yt ys a mere miscomprehensioun.

    Else I shalt render thee a wastour, perhaps to caress a caudel of some unsavourliche Figura. Mayhaps thou shalt lick uppe sayd caudel.



  47. Loveli Chaucer:
    Ich am a younge clerke in studying at the universitie in min toune, and ywis, we have just completede an course directed to the kenninge of this thine outline of thin werke!
    But juste aftere the ende of the Parsoune's Tale methinks thou yseemed depressed, verily, for thou wert not so funnie as thou usuallie art, and thou didst try to take backe almoste alle of thine werkes. Hwy didst thou so? It maketh me sorely sad, certaine, to heare thou renounce thine goodlie and noble stories. Is it possible that thou wert guilt-trippede by the Parsoun?
    With Mucel Love,
    Youre owne trewe student-clerke
    PS: I am trulie sorrie for min spellinge mistakes... they emphasize the spellinge of Latin more than thin Englisch at min schol! But ic guesse thou nolde taken me for an scribenere? Al be I can nat spelle, Ic can copie verie nicelie and have a good hand.

  48. Shakespeare, WillyJuly 5, 2006 at 5:27 AM

    Shall I compare thine tale to an summer's day?

    No. Your spelling art atrocious, and your grammar also. A plague on all your tales. My plays are better than thine.

    Fo' shizzle, ma nizzle. Innit.

    Word bling bling.

    How come thine head art so bigge?

    PS: Job well done chum. Much laughter in the Lit classroom, and the Lang one also (though those philistines don't quite get it, eh comrade?) Looking forward to seeing more of your stuff, art thou going to tour anytime soon? Perhaps with support from the Pussycat Dolls.

  49. Ich wene thilke hastow much ironye. Ich liketh unless niste what wights were en the Tarbard Inn at the seeme tyme. Namely liste me and Ich wont rede mo.

  50. Swiche an excellente idea wold attayne grete literarye merit! A tale of swiche delite wold raught the fer halves of the erthe. Oonly freendes so deere that have goon on pilgrimages may tellen the best tales. Tales of harlotrie, love, hevene, japes, dronkenesse, ironye, and scorned loveres wold be knowen by wightes aboute the lond. Maybe aftir, moore tales wold be tolde by wightes fro the oother londes, amendenyng the japes of al societies and tyme knowen moore and moore! Excellente idea for a poeme! Ich aplod ye.

  51. By Seinte Thomas! What diddest Adam Pinkhurst vnto thee? A rascaleye knave that Adam! Ich preye it nas noone so yvil aas yheered I from my friend, Robyn. A sleigh, queynte churl is he. Thou shouldest ysee what with a hoote kultour he kan! Swiche a goliardeys, he beeth! God blesse thy werk!

  52. Whan that ye booke is preinted and acumen in this sorry world, what assureinces have ye that it shall be spread across the lans and behelden by the little, suffering children? What spein-offs has yon marketeer plans? Televisioun stories? Shirtes of Tee? Toyes for the suffering maidens? Board games for the alehouses? A new ale?

    Absent spein-offs your hopes of posteriority may fade as the shoures of Aprille must dry and vanish, leaving ounly happy memorie.

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