Sir John in Whitby

O, creuel fate! Whan laste I posted heere I was y-deep in love, as I pray yow gentils well remembre. Allas, I have y-lost myne hertes love, the faire Kayleigh! Whan I retourned to Londoun I despatched to her a token of myne affecioun--a dozen boxes of fisshe fingers and half of a stagges corpse. (Thankes to Katherine de Swineford for thisse advice!) Ymagine myne surprise whan I was y-told by myne messanger that she is already y-wedded! It seemeth that her housbond y-was in Margate for the nyght and that the fair Kayleigh y-was untrewe to hym and me! She did nat retourn the fisshe fingers or stagges corpse, neither. Woe, woe unto me! The search for a bride, it beginneth anew.

Thus have I yspent much of Novembre in love-longyng, but now I am agayn on the kinges priveee businesse, in York-shirre. I confess, before two dayes ago I had nat ventured north of Stoke (and then only to go to Alton Towers), but I lyke it heere. There y-been muchel good seafood, and the comouns of Whitby are ryght polite, albeit that they y-weare muchel blakke.

I am y-lodgyng at the abbey, the whych place ys verray draughty, but I kepe warme ynough. This business of the kynges is such that I schal likely be heere in York-shirre until the nexte yeere, but that ys all ryght: I may make some day-trippes. I have been y-told of a carpentere who ys a man in the forme of a mouse in a village nat too far awaye, and I must go and see that wondere with myne owne eyes! Whan I do I schal y-telle yow of yt.

Ugh. It beeth late in the nyght, and I must retire to bedde. Good nyght, lordes and ladyes all, and I schal telle yow all more of York-shirre soone.

6 comment "Sir John in Whitby"

  1. If thou seekest love that is trew
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  2. I finde thy blog amuseant. I hath addende thine blogge to mine 'Side Interests' links on mine blogge.

  3. Fie, Sir John. Marryage maye be an honourable estate, but fyne fisshe fingres and morsyls of stagge corpse oft can persuayde a mayden to dallye moste righteously! Methinks thou spendeth thy wealthe poorly!

    Look ye! Rather than"untille death thou dost parte," pay ye in cashe, enjoy thy dalliaunce, and hie thee down the road!

    Besydes, in cashe deales, the maiden maye be more disposed to wear the nun's habitte for a bit of "Naughty Nun and Randy Priest", or "be togate for "The Sacking of Rome by ye well-hungge barbarian", and other lyke amusementes.

    Just sayin'.

  4. Sir Iohne why dostow engage in dalliaunce when thou shouldst be about myne bvsinesse?

  5. Ne drede the nat, Sir Johne! Knowstow she may be wedded to some Hugh de Swineford, who is an ershoole and then deyeth ful fast. Then she shal be thin to take, ful reddy for consolacioun as a widwe!

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